Published November 2, 2011

You update your blog live from the county library

Tonight Luke Teaford's Choose Your Own Adventure Blog comes to you live from the county library
You're live blogging the county library

The purpose of your life is to bring comedy to the masses, and that’s going to be difficult with the intermittent Time Warner Cable “High Speed Online” in your area. It’s also going to be difficult to bring comedy to the masses when only a couple dozen people read your blog with any regularity. Maybe tomorrow you will dig deep into the Google Analytics and find out what’s going on with that, but now you have to walk to the library and spread some cheer.

You walk through the door feeling productive. “I’ll pick up something to read for later tonight,” you think as you quickly walk through the aisles. There are more memoirs about walking with Jesus and finding Jesus than you can believe and everything else is loosely alphabetized. No, you haven’t got time to read. You begin writing.

“Ok, ok, what’s a good topic?” Nothing comes to mind as you scratch your chin. “Something that will get everyone talking on Facebook. Something everyone can relate to. More Kardashian jokes? No, those are over and done with already! National Novel Writing Month? That could be something, I guess, even though non-writers hate novels and any good writer hates writing. Having babies? Folks love reading about fetuses developing.”

You feel the glazed eyes of Sumter County, South Carolina library patrons on you as you try to write. The pressure is high; after all, it’s sweeps month!

You decide to: